Fear. Something intangible and enigmatic that manifests itself in the physical world, which is in my opinion is a double-edged sword. Most of the time it causes people to lose heart, induce doubt and succumb to one's "limits" or in some cases limits that society seems to impose on the mindless drones that inhabit it. But sometimes it causes people to take arms and wage war, go beyond their empirical limits, turns the spineless into persons of passion, conviction and courage, and it makes me challenge the world and say..."Fuck you, kneel down and pay homage!"

I want to get into Ateneo Law School. I talked to Debs (Waps and Javie's friend), she's a first year law student, and like almost every law student, she keeps telling me that all the years we've spent studying and all the truck loads of shit we've had to overcome doesn't prepare you for what's ahead. And I'm totally fine with that. I have been through a lot in 22 years, I'm not saying that these things have prepared me for anything. Actually, I don't think anything can prepare us for what's ahead. I'm not saying these things have made me fearless, the fact of the matter is I am afraid but that doesn't in any manner influence my conviction, in fact it has made it stronger. So what the hell am I talking about? What am I afraid of? I'm afraid of not being able to experience the hell law students go through. I am afraid of not being able to have sleepless night toiling over waist high cases and packs of cigarettes. I am afraid of not being able to taste the kind of bliss and paranoia law school offers. I am afraid of not being able to taste the experience peroid. I want it so bad, I'm willing to sell my soul. Hahaha

So maybe all this nonsense I've been writing about isn't just about fear, maybe its not even fear. Maybe its about desire all along. It's the desire, the zest and the willingness to brave through it. My mom always used to tell me that when I was a kid, she always fancied me as a fighter. The type who comes out swinging everytime the world backs me to a corner. And I think I am in all facets of the word.